I mentioned in Dream a big dream: Time to die how I’ve become very interested in the Tibetan Buddhist idea of Bardos, those “between” states, of which the best known is that between death and rebirth.
I got a chance to feel some of what it’s like to be in that state during the recent snow and ice storm here. I won’t bore with details save to say that due to weather and downed trees, I was home alone with no power, no water and extremely limited communications for a number of days. But where I was was hit much harder than other areas so for other people I’m close to, life continued on more normally.
It was a strange feeling to be cut off like that with glimpses of the world continuing on without me. It felt in a way like being in that state between death and rebirth, where you’re gone from the world but you can see life continuing without you.
The odd thing is, I don’t really know what I make of it all, if anything. Certainly it feels like another experience that shapes me in my continuing, deepening understanding and thoughts around death (like I talked about in Dream a big dream: Time to die). And certainly that is the most cut off and isolated I’ve felt in a very long time. But I don’t find any big revelations coming from this, at least not yet. And when I originally wrote this post and went into more detail about the experience, I found I didn’t like the tone of the post: it felt too negative and complaining almost.
I think one thing I’m seeing of late is a willingness to do posts that have no answers. That instead just identify questions that are still being processed. I guess this is one of them.